A Modest Proposal to End the World

1 Jun
  1. Enriched Flour
  2. Dextrose
  3. Vegetable Oil Shortening (Made from hydrogenated soybean and/or cottonseed oil)
  4. Water
  5. Sugar
  6. Soy flour
  7. Mono and diglycerides
  8. Dried yolk
  9. Wheat gluten
  10. Yeast
  11. Dry skim milk
  12. Calcium sulphate
  13. Ammonium sulphate
  14. Calcium Peroxide
  15. Calcium Phosphate Monobasic
  16. Calcium Phosphate Dibasic
  17. Ammonium Phosphate Dibisic
  18. Sodium Stearoyl-2-Lactylate
  19. Whey Powder
  20. Modified Corn Starch
  21. Ascorbic Acid
  22. Sodium Bicarbonate
  23. Calcium Carbonate
  24. Lecithin
  25. Salt
  26. Calcium Propionate
  27. Cellulose Gum
  28. Natural Lemon
  29. Mace
  30. Cinnamon and Vanilla Flavours
  31. Artificial Pentosanase
  32. Protease
  33. Corn Maltodextrin
  34. Sodium Caseinate
  35. Corn Syrup Solids
  36. Agar
  37. Locust Bean Gum
  38. Sodium Phosphate Dibasic
  39. Sorbitan Monostearate
  40. BHT

Glaze may also contain:

  1. Calcium Carbonate
  2. Agar
  3. Locust Bean Gum
  4. Disodium Phosphate
  5. Sorbitan Monostearate

Manufactured by your local Krispy Kreme Doughnut Store under the authority or Krispy Kreme Doughnut Corporation.


Keeping with the topic of junk-based foods in Tyler’s last post, I find it absolutely comical to list the ingredients of Krispy Kreme’s recipe for their original glazed donut. Krispy Kreme likes to boast that it’s their original recipe from as far back as 1937 – and this highlights the problem. We eat crap. People eat crap – and they would hate to stop.

‘Oh no – another blogger unveiling the secrets of some evil industry or corporation’ — some may cry. I don’t need to make the case that donuts are unhealthy. The case has already been made for me, so many times and on so many subjects. A great example is one consumption that is widely known to be an unhealthy habit, yet is also extremely popular. Yes, the tobacco cigarette.

Humans have been in fact smoking all kinds of things for centuries. Production of Tobacco cigarettes in particular began in the mid 1800s, and by the early 1900’s they were taking off, particularly in the United States. By the mid 20th-century the popularity for cigarettes had skyrocketed.

In the early centuries of smoking, many state leaders denounced smoking on the basis of health. Fast-forward to the 1950’s and smoking had become a social habit in the developed countries. It took another 50 years before the countless anti-smoking campaigns and campaigners finally managed to make large steps towards legal reform. It is now illegal to smoke in most indoor places in developed countries.

So it took a few bloody centuries to get all that done.

How many anti-junk food advocates will we able to find? Smoking had scientists and doctors talking about lung disease and cancer. Data seemed to support a 20-year lag between smoking and lung cancer, and while some argue the data isn’t conclusive, it’s a lot more conclusive than what we will ever get in the junk food area. It’s hard to convince the public of the link between junk food and health because everyone eats so much crap that, if we gave them a list of healthy things they could eat, their brains would explode.

Actually their stomachs would shrink but that’s not really graphic enough.

Being healthy also means fewer diseases, illnesses, and possibly extended lifespans. But that’s another topic.

I will end by saying this – If our species is to stay healthy, we need to rethink what we choose to eat, and how much we eat too. If we want to keep smoking, it will be the end of us. Many of you reading probably know of some people who smoke, and maybe even some who succumbed to smoking-related illnesses. If we want to keep eating donuts and other unhealthy foods, it will be the end of us. Many of you probably know of some people who eat unhealthily – you may even be guilty of this yourself.

One way of ending the world is to eat and consume ourselves to death. It’s happened for centuries and may continue simply because we like something so much that we will ignore all reason to avoid it. Or, if we choose to, we can stop these nonsensical habits and allow our species to rise to a state of intelligence; to become a species that does not give in to its weakest desire or smallest whim. How’s that for a modest proposal?


(For everyone’s sake, the 29th ingerdient is, hopefully, “mace” as in the nutmeg-based spice and not the tear gas. )

One Response to “A Modest Proposal to End the World”

  1. ashlea June 2, 2010 at 8:20 am #

    hah, thanks good post.

    The history of the doughnut is intriguing too – became popular post WWI as American soldiers were served doughnuts because they were fatty and ‘kept you warm’. Steve Penfold now calls it a Canadian icon.

    Wendy Mitchinson in the department of History at UW gave an interesting talk in one of my classes about our ‘obesogenic society’ – there are biological reasoning too – we feast because we don’t know where our next meal is coming from, we’re hard wired to take advantage of that… if we don’t eat it, we may not get another chance… and to preserve energy for finding food, which once upon a time made sense.

    On a somewhat related note:
    Drive-thrus at issue in new Cobourg urban design guidelines

    Credit to Brett Throop for posting on facebook and Moe Berrigan for this comment: “Sorry, sir, you’re going to have to stand up to eat shit.”

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